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Nw6bear
Senior Member
Username: Nw6bear

Post Number: 68
Registered: 10-2013

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Posted on Wednesday, May 11, 2016 - 12:05 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I am 76 years old and I don't have such a pessimistic view of old age as “Engjock". When I was in my 20's, I used to think that
the “gay life” would finish at 35! but, of course it didn't. When you are young, you have certain set views as to what attracts you – as
time marches on those views mellow and you even find that you crave types that you physically disliked in your youth. I used to
cringe at redheads because of their pale skin – now, even at my age, I would run to catch a bus to gaze on one!

In the “old days”, like most of the young, I set my sights high and wouldn't consider someone who was less that 8 out of 10 on my
“top of the pops”. Now, that is out of the question and so your sights get lower and lower with the passing of time. Although, I am
not 2 out of 10 yet ;-) Fortunately I have never had an age problem, they can be as young as 18 or even older than me depending
on whether they are physically my type.

Of course my “hunting grounds” are the saunas (you may have seen my reviews), in my opinion, one of the best places to cruise.
You know that your contact is physically clean and you see what you are getting as well as having the chance to chat, if you wish, to give
sex a more humanising aspect.

I have also noticed in life that there is someone for everyone, if you have a bit of patience. It still surprises me that I can still
“pull” some youngsters even below 25! You see, not everyone is looking for the conventional Prince Charming – some are looking
for something a little bit different, a daddy, a granddaddy, an old grizzly bear or even a large beer belly. Human nature is really
very strange – thank God!
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Engjock
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Username: Engjock

Post Number: 49
Registered: 04-2013

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Posted on Wednesday, May 04, 2016 - 05:32 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hi all
It's been a long while since I posted anything on here, but reading the discussion about ageism does, unfortunately, ring true.
Just over a year ago I wrote a piece in an on-line gay magazine about how ageist the gay community is, with a focus on the TV triple series 'Cucumber', 'Banana' and 'Tofu' and the former's storyline about 'older' gay men. The oldest character was about 46. Ah!, so what is anyone who is over 50? Ancient?
The article generated a lot of interest; not in my discussion about ageism (although there were a few comments, some in favour of my argument, some against) but mainly about the series in general and whether it was OK to depict the gay community as serially hedonistic.
Hey ho; unfortunately we live in a world where thin young things are venerated and us older members of the human race are dismissed as having screwed the world up. Ah, the naivity of youth.
I will end with the conclusion to that article. Make of it what you will:
'Before any younger person who might be reading this dismisses me as a bitter and twisted old man who has lost his youth, looks and hair (one of which I will agree to, the other two, NO!), just remember this: with any luck and a following wind, you too will be over 50 one day. That day will come sooner than you can possibly imagine and then you too will be looking back, if not in anger, then in amazement at how quickly the world has become out of step with your needs, wants and desires. From my perspective and I would suspect from 659 999 other older gay guy’s perspectives, I am just trying to right a wrong. In the same way that the campaigners for gay rights in the 60s, 70s and 80s didn’t expect the world to agree with them overnight, I don’t expect things to change immediately. However, it would be nice if some brave Commissioning Editor, Marketing Director or successful Script Writer recognised that there is a large and untapped ready-made market for their product and began to help start the change.'
Stay safe and have fun and, Intrakota, I really hope that you find happiness. There are a lot of great gays, both old and young, who will happily welcome you into their community.
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Mechanic
Senior Member
Username: Mechanic

Post Number: 204
Registered: 08-2009


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Posted on Tuesday, March 22, 2016 - 11:33 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

It' six years since this discussion was started and three years since the last comment.

So, now 2016 - is there any change - have things Cruising-wise got better or worse in the last few years thanks to the Internet, and improved mobile communication.

Are there more Guys actively cruising or are more just sitting in the vehicles doing nothing - or perhaps driving up and down laybys like idiots unaware that a rolling stone never gathers moss!!
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Intrakota
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Username: Intrakota

Post Number: 3
Registered: 07-2011

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Posted on Thursday, July 11, 2013 - 07:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Thank you for the interesting replies boyz, I think everyone has hit the nail on the head over this one, I also believe that a lot of suppressed anger floods silently through the gay community mostly directed towards our own kind.
For those with a lack of self confidence the fear of rejection can be the biggest isolator in a community where it has become mandatory to be above perfection, how pathetic, immature and totally gay is that.
Intrakota
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Don'ty let the bastards win!
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Posted From: 62.3.206.17

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Posted on Wednesday, July 10, 2013 - 08:43 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Intrakota, I was really saddened to read your post and hope things cheer up for you soon. It's not just the gay community that becoming ageist and intolerant. Government is constantly putting out the message that older members of society are 'taking' young peoples jobs etc and there's always got to be a scapegoat its OK to hate, now it's no longer acceptable to say things racist but OK about those on benefits and getting older. Just remember we've paid in all of our lives and it's not a benefit it's a right to reclaim taxes. The gay world has always been youth centric, they do say you're dead at 35 in gay years, but at 64 I've found lots of people like the older man and you can't let the bastards win. The only way to beat bullies of any type is to stand up to them and be proud of who you are. Chin up mate!

(Message edited by rigger on July 10, 2013)
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Kcjones
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Username: Kcjones

Post Number: 185
Registered: 04-2007

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Posted on Wednesday, July 10, 2013 - 11:46 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

i have only just started on line i dont use well known gay cruising sites and i have found it ok a lot of youger for older guys around and no strings bi lads, iam always polite and reply to every message i dont go for stereo type gay guys fit and v.g.l just normal blokes i only check my messages once a day and yes plenty of wasters but hey thats life! its there loss as i know iam genuine! so give it a go lads i have met very nice guys in a short time and have had fun with older guys like my age lols
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Mechanic
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Username: Mechanic

Post Number: 134
Registered: 08-2009

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Posted on Wednesday, July 10, 2013 - 08:54 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I couldn't have put it better Intrakota!.. but its not only the Internet but life outside cyberspace as well. When out and about most just sit like zoombies looking and waiting for Adonis to arrive and anyone who doesn't meet their expectations is often verbally abused. Ask on line for help and no one bothers to reply: answer someone elses enquiry and you will be lucky if you get a thank you but don't let it get the better of you... don't abandon your standards because of theirs, just politely wave the proverbial two fingers at the intolerance of today's attitudes and walk proud having grown up in a much nicer world!
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Intrakota
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Username: Intrakota

Post Number: 2
Registered: 07-2011

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Posted on Wednesday, July 10, 2013 - 12:42 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I've actually got to the point of hating being gay, I find "most but not all" to be ignorant, arrogant, antisocial and bitchy all too willing to hide behind a keyboard and just play stupid mind games.

I can't remember the last time I met anyone even for a drink and a chat let alone anything more, then again I am 55 and as I remember being told a couple of years ago, I shouldn't be allowed to use a certain well known website at my age, OK not the most unfriendly message I have ever received but certainly one you don't forget.

I try to suppress my gay feelings and avoid/ignore what has become a very unwelcoming and intolerant community as much as possible, while at the same time they are demanding acceptance and tolerance from the outside world.

In these days of modern instant worldwide communication from the palm of your hand, it seems that all these devices are actually doing is driving us all apart.
Intrakota
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Rigger
Moderator
Username: Rigger

Post Number: 1427
Registered: 03-2003

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Posted on Tuesday, April 03, 2012 - 11:55 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I'll add my two-penneth from the point of view of a Moderator.

On a regular basis emails come in asking for help - password issues, content issues, how do I do this and how do I do that questions and replies are sent which quite often ask for further details - frequently there is no further response.

From time to time messages appear which contain content which is not approved - for example a mobile or telephone number and we contact the writer with appropriate advice, often saying further access is withheld until they acknowledge our advice - we often do not have a reply.

Frequently on the message boards you see someone asking for an update on local events and/or for directions and, despite the fact the people will have read that request, will know the area being asked about and will know the current circumstances in the area, they just do not take a couple of minutes to reply.

It is disappointing and seems to be a sign of the times - as I read elsewhere recently, where we seem to be becoming a nation of individuals where most will take what is on offer but few will give anything back in return.
Maybe further spin-off of the benefits culture which has developed over recent years!
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@ to ignore or reply??
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Posted From: 62.3.206.17

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Posted on Tuesday, April 03, 2012 - 11:05 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I doubt you're either old fashioned or out of touch it's just that things in the cyber age have become (dare I say it) too easy. Your experience is more the norm than unusual and I have an, unproven, theory that some people like to see how many people they can snag without any intention of taking things further, some sort of ego trip. Some mates of mine reckon if you get anywhere in 5 hits out of 100 you are doing well! When people had to make a real effort they didn't waste so much time. Sad but true I'm afraid.
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to ignore or reply??
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Posted From: 195.93.21.71

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Posted on Tuesday, April 03, 2012 - 09:52 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I am puzzled what has happened to good manners? I am old enough to recall the days when we used to answer adverts in magazines that most people answered the letters they received. However it seems with the advent of e-mails that is old hat despite it being easier and cheaper. I have had 3 guys recently contact me as a result of a message I placed on here and 2 out of the 3 have ignored me after just two e-mail exchanges despite my requesting. Should you decide you do not wish to continue a quick "NO THANKS" would be appreciated and then we all know where we stand and we will not be wasting each others time. I ALWAYS TELL A PERSON IF I THINK IT IS NOT GOING TO WORK FOR US. Am I old fashioned and out of touch?
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Graywolf
New member
Username: Graywolf

Post Number: 129
Registered: 02-2011

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Posted on Saturday, December 03, 2011 - 06:31 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Regarding the current thread running on the gloryhole section and the stupid postings on other sites, sometime back there was a cruising area near me, known mainly by word of mouth, where guys cruised quite safely and even got along with other users ie dog walkers .

Sadly though it got posted on-line, as if that was not bad enough some stupid fuckwits started putting up signs alongside the road saying " gay wood this way ", the result being that queer bashing increased, along with an increased police presence in this case the local vice squad went overboard trying entrapment, videoing people going in/out, even harrassing others who cycled or walked in the area, despite a sign at the entrance to the wood that stated quite clearly that members of the public were welcome to use the wood and enjoy the use of the public footpaths with no opening/closing times stated , the police would question everyone they encountered on their frequent sweeps of the area, at one point telling people to leave if it was in the evening or at night until someone with some clout got in touch with the local police inspector after which the threatening manner ceased.
Even now years later the police are still visiting most days, also sadly some cruisers are still behaving like spoilt brats determined it seems to cause as much upset as they can.

Regarding the suggestion that this site be closed, why close a site that many enjoy, ok many stories like my own and Roly's are not to everyones taste, personally I do not enjoy saunas but still read his stories, likewise ' T-girls ' although I know many x-dressers and pre/post op transgender people I respect their way of life.
You are a victim of the rules you live by.

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mikmal6
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Posted From: 90.193.9.142

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Posted on Sunday, July 17, 2011 - 03:40 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I think the warnings are a positive, indeed a caring action. So thank you guys.

Also, given that there are so many gay sites, we all have immense choice about where we spend our time and energy.
Wanting to prevent or discourage warnings or info about risky places or assaults on people, seems strange to me.
After all, what's one less place to visit, on line or on terra firma?

If someone's just having a whinge, and why not? I'll read on in the hope that they're funny or witty or wise.
If that's not the case, I wouldn't try to stop them whinging,
I'd simply skip over future posts as soon as it's apparent they've got a bee in their CKs.

Go well
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Bendy
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Username: Bendy

Post Number: 96
Registered: 02-2006

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Posted on Sunday, December 19, 2010 - 02:19 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

To Keepit neatandtidy.
I understand what you are saying.
That there are straight(so called) and gay people.
Well what about the large amount of people that do not fit into that pigeon hole.Not every peg fits the hole.
Or is it that bisexual guys/gals should not be allowed to mix with other (so called normal straight/gay people).
As for dogging gay's straights/bi's/tv/tx's.All take part(with a mixed bag).It is because inhibitions have dropped,and the internet/transport has made this possible.
We are no longer living in the bad old days of just using magazines to find our pleasure.
I have no intention to offend or slur your thread.
But we do live in modern times .
I understand,that if you are looking for gay site only(-easy to find).And you get a lot of unwanted results.It can be frustating.
Just one other thought,look back fifty years or so and the the word gay mean't carefree.
So it is not so hard to see why modern society moves on.
Do it until it hurts then do it some more.....
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Keepit neatandtidy
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Posted From: 217.44.27.210

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Posted on Tuesday, November 09, 2010 - 11:39 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Reading some Gay websites recently there seems to be a trend for male/female (Dogging) couples to register and advertise for Guys to have sex with the female. Squirt website certainly seems to be going that way.
OK for bi-guys but not everyone is and what, I wonder, would be the response if gay guys started to register on dogging sites for male/female couples where they could have sex with the male.
Let's keep it simple and straightforward - Gay websites for Gay Guys and m/f couples on websites that cater for m/f couples.

When magazines were the only means of contact each group was catered for in their own way: the internet seems to have made it easy for borders to be crossed and exclusive gay websites seem to be on there way out.
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HELLO cattlemarket
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Posted From: 195.93.21.39

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Posted on Wednesday, August 04, 2010 - 11:46 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

at thw risk of upsetting you I am posting this message

this posting just appeared on another site:-
==================================================

WARNING On the local TV news monday evening it was reported police had received a number of complaints about "lewd and anti-social sexual behaviour" here. They are stepping up patrols and action will be taken against offenders.

TAKE CARE GUYS
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Mechanic
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Username: Mechanic

Post Number: 60
Registered: 08-2009

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Posted on Thursday, July 29, 2010 - 12:09 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Like most things in life there are pros and cons with websites.
For me that they should provide information, including cautions and other advice whatever the source of that information is one of the 'pros' and particularly useful when reading up on an area you are not familiar with and which you may be about to visit.
If warnings puts people off and they do not visit a certain area so be it and if others want to ignore warnings and continue to visit a highlighted area that's their choice as well but I doubt if they will get any sympathy if they are subsequently caught up in whatever the local caution was about and bemoan the fate which befell them.

I don't see cautions and warnings as being the downfall of websites but moreso messages which come under the heading of "Too much information" like graphic descriptions of daytime encounters in sensitive areas such as Motorway Service areas, Public Parks and Shopping Centres as examples, all of which serve as fodder for the Press who constantly scour the Internet for a story.

Like any vehicle, if used sensibly the Internet can be a useful tool and like any vehicle if abused it can lead to disaster.
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BOARDS ARE USEFULL
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Posted From: 195.93.21.39

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Posted on Wednesday, July 28, 2010 - 12:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

call me old fashioned CATTLEMARKET but I am very pleased to read advice/warnings of places where there are or have been anti-gay or other activities which could present problems for us cruising. I have found the police message section for suffolk VERY good and last year when I had a problem at Barton mills they were very helpful and NON judgemental. NOT all of us are OUT or able to be as much as we may like to be. You are one of the lucky ones who is (I assume rightly or wrongly) OUT and have gay friends and can discuss issues with them I am and many other guys are not in that position and so rely on the boards for information. Long may they continue and I personally thank the moderators for all their HARD WORK
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Cattlemarket
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Username: Cattlemarket

Post Number: 2
Registered: 12-2009

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Posted on Wednesday, January 27, 2010 - 03:15 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Toby's Walks, Blythburgh.
Gate 44, Dunwich Forest
Dip Farm Car Park - Corton Nr. Lowestoft
Corton Cliffs - Nr. Lowestoft

All of these places along the Suffolk coast are still active even at this time of year, so yes there is still some Suffolk Action to be had.

If you want to meet, need directions to any of these places or just more info then just send me a message.

"Just read on another site", "just seen on another board", "warning", "danger danger" a familiar account of daily life on these boards? It all sounds very admirable, but when guys want sex they don't want to be bombarded with all this stuff, especially on cruising websites like these. I generally hear from lots of other guys that they no longer come to these boards. It used to be a fun place to come along and arrange meets with other guys with no hassle and no problems!

Now all we see is warnings, written in red across most of the cruising boards. Those who used to come here, now go elsewhere because of that, myself included. This site has now become more like a Police community website and when virtually EVERY posting has the police mentioned in it, what's the point?

Straight couples and other people don't consult a notice board before they go and have outdoor sex or dogging in the local car park, they just go and get on with it and that's my point!

The gay community is sick to death of being hounded by the police and this portrayal of "co-operation", friendliness and "I'm on your side" sort of thing, is like most of the TV's around and quite frankly unconvincing!

All these complaints that come from various people at various sites, would they have complained if it had been straight people they had seen having sex, I don't think so? The fact is that everyone turns a blind eye when sex between a man and woman is seen at public places, but if it's two men then always the opposite is true.

We have an equal age of consent in this country but we will NEVER have an equal attitude especially while hypocrisy and homophobia continue to reign in all walks of officialdom whether they wear a uniform or not!


(Message edited by cattlemarket on July 10, 2010)

(Message edited by modm on July 12, 2010)

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